Two weeks ago I had a phone call telling me to make another mammogram appointment--to another hospital. My recent mammogram showed a finding that requires additional imaging studies, such as an ultrasound or additional mammographic views to complete their evaluation.
So I made the appointment within 72 hours. I was in a state of compounding doubts, speculations and restlessness. Having had two aunts on my paternal side died of breast cancer and my brother, first cousin and my mom's sister & brother also died of cancer, I'm considered very high risk. Plus, I've been having pressure there on & off. I just ignored it for if I could walk & jog 17 miles per week with no weight excess, no cholesterol and no blood pressure problems, and my most assurance of all-- God is with me, so I thought I should be good to go.
How do I come against human nature? I have substantiated fears...I could be next. I needed to be objective & strong. I had to put my house in order--meaning I have to make my last will of testament; make amends with what I am able to do and reach out to those who have been part of my life that somehow I lost connection with; and so on and so forth. My mind was in a battlefield for three days. My worst dilemma, how I'm going to prepare my two sons who have been my breath of life and inspiration with what could be our most challenging journey together as a family.
To my astonishment, they told me not to worry myself to death; that I'm going to be okay; that it can't be my time because I'm not a grandma yet. That did get me to chuckle and as a child of God, I should be testifying of how God as the Healer of all diseases and illnesses. That my body is His temple and no affliction couldn't be overcome by victory in Jesus.
And so I prayed...When King Hezekiah learned that he was going to die soon, he cried, and wept bitterly and most of all he prayed earnestly to God. God extended King Hezekiah's life for another fifteen more years. My heart came into remembrance how God made the blind see, the deaf hear, how Jesus healed the ten men with leprosy, how he said, "Lazarus, come forth" and he came back to life. And many more healing Jesus performed physically and spiritually.Oh, how amazing is our God.
O the day of my appointment, I was already armored with the security of God's promise. I just have to claim it and it's done. Although I cried in my car, it wasn't a cry of bitterness. My mom was there; my oldest sister, too. We're all waiting for the result. This time it didn't feel like waiting forever, neither a propensity for the uncertainty. I believe for one thing; that I will believe the report of the Lord and I know that whatever I may go through life, I won't be alone. He granted me serenity and a new Hope. It's up to me now to use it according to His plans for my life.
God is not finished with me yet. I know I'll have more tests and trials for my faith but this time I'm getting closer to the Heaven's door. To God I give all the glory...The second result of my mammogram was God's report. And my living testimony. God is faithful.
As always, you take care and
God Bless
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