I'm writing with so many conjuring thoughts circling the hemisphere of my brain...Spring Break is just over. I failed my list of short term goals. I didn't organize the clutter in my garage neither discard the over-piled boxes of Nintendo magazines and the gadgets relative to playing Mario Brothers owned by my eldest son who refused to throw them away even when they're all savaged by time and space. What could be their worth? To my son's perspective, they're his legacy of being a gamer, an artist, and his threshold. To me, their physicality must be in their rightful place--to the large bin to be picked up on garbage day. My take is that, you already have the treasures of experiences and memories locked in your mind and heart then you don't need to save them and let them rot obviously...
Well, during the inception and evolving precedence of COVID 19, I was binging on food since I was confined at home. I didn't really realize that up since stepping on that weigh scale and the numbers don't lie. I have had developed unwanted layers in my belly which to my surprise, I kind of denied the imperativeness of losing the 12 lbs. I gained because I see that compounding pounds to almost every human being in my circles of friends, in the family and my co-workers. Everywhere I go especially in the grocery stores, I see a lot of people maybe have the same issues like mine. It didn't really scare me at first. I subjected myself with identifiable reasonable excuses. I told myself, "you're still within the range according to the periodic table of height, weight, age factors. And then I just started experiencing heartburns, bloating after eating and severe insomnia and maybe even panic attacks. I became what I haven't contemplated to be one...heavy and thick; fat and obese especially when all of your life, you were identified as slim or just right physique.
Oh well...what am I going to do about it? First, I accepted that it is a problem that is affecting my confidence and my over all well being. I know it's just 12 lbs. but if I don't do anything about it now, that number will quadruple and then who's to blame? Myself and no other factors...
So, this past Spring Break, I made at peace with myself. I'm not going to do the list of household chores but instead work squarely on what's keeping me to feel alive and well again. Without my precious dogs with me anymore, walking has been stifling. It just stayed on my mind. It didn't flow in my system. But then an epiphany surmise: what would happen to my advocacy of staying healthy through regiment exercise shared with others? I have a son that has struggled obesity all his life and now that he's finally driven to lose weight, here I am, had fallen off the wagon. This should be more than enough to hit the trails again and throw away incompetence...
The other day, I was walking at Lions' Park where I took Cocoa & Tootsie when they were still here...An older man just passed me effortlessly. I said to myself this can't be happening that someone much older than me just swinging not too shabby. Although I was jealous of him outwalking me, I kind of respect and admire the tenacity. I feel my body out of synchronicity. I feel heavy, the weight of extra lbs. are deterring me to walk/jog swiftly. Not a good feeling. But this is accountability: it just didn't happen overnight, weeks, but in months of undisciplined overeating.
But...I'm here Now to redeem myself. Losing 1 lb. just last week is a congratulatory week for me. I also started learning to play the keyboard. Thanks to my brother-in-law and my sister for blessing me another musical instrument to learn. Google, it is to help you accomplish that skill. Learning another skill confronts idleness. We have to be proactive and fight the cravings for unhealthy food. Most of all I thank the Lord God Almighty for being so faithful in my life whenever I was ready "to throw in the towel" to losing my heart...God says, in Matthew 28:20 "I am with you always, even unto the end of the world."
Don't we all need God? I do, for without His mercy and grace, Heaven may be unreachable for me and you to call our Eternal Home...God Bless
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